Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
