The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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