Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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