i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize