Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
