drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
