Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
he was CRYING into my vagina
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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