She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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