I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
