ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I pour the whiskey from now on
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
