I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
