marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I wish I only lived at night.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
