She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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