I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
