Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I have tasted many bathrooms
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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