They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
