thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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