I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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