the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
