you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
