So drunk its hurt
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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