It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
