found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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