wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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