overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
