I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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