if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize