I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
