Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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