I like to think it a success when the cops are called
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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