i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Girls should come with a carfax report
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
