do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
