Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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