Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
