I hope mine doesn't look like that
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
