i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize