Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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