I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
