Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
