I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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