dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
