Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
The air was thick with penises
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
