please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
