Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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