All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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