Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize