Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
