Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Small penises have feelings too.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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