Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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