how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
