At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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